App’s Mania(2021) 剧本
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本文写作于 2021 年,最终获得了校级一等奖第一名。

但现在看真是尬尬的……

The lights turn on. Play the snoring and alarm rings. CLOCK stands on the center stage.

CLOCK

Dear Mark,it¡¯s 8:00 .It¡¯s time to get up.I have been reminding you to get up since 5:30, but you still lie on your bed.

The snoring sound was still played. Clock turns up its volume.

CLOCK

Get up please. I don¡¯t want to say it again.

CLOCK

I SAID WAKE UP! You such a FOOL! I will deafen you if you insist on lying in BED!

SETTINGS and BROWSER step on the stage.

SETTINGS

You are wasting your energy, Clock. Mark always does that no matter what you say. According to my background data, he played on his phone until 2:30 yesterday.

BROWSER

Yep, I even was asked to search for something boring last night. Like ¡±How to be an Altman without a Transformer.¡±

CLOCK

No one wants to save him? He can¡¯t live on his phone forever, just like us.

SETTINGS

In fact, we are just some Apps in his phone, what can we do for him?

CLOCK

Of course! We can help him with our own strength, at least don¡¯t let him addicted to the phone all day!

MOM(V.O)

Get up, Mark! Breakfast is ready!

BROWSER

Oh no! It¡¯s mom. We¡¯d better to pray that Mark gets up quickly ,or I suggest you plugging your ears!

MOM(V.O)

Mark! HOW DARE YOU! Don¡¯t you hear me? Did you stay up late to play with your damn phone AGAIN last night£¿£¡

MARK£¨V.O£©

No, mom! I am changing! Wait for a moment!

BROWSER

Pinocchio! I bet his nose will grow long soon!

MOM(V.O)

It¡¯s 9:00 a.m! Hurry up!

CLOCK

Pinocchio¡¯s mom, a classic parental lie. It¡¯s only 8:05 now.

SETTINGS

Forget about that. I thought of wonderful way to help Mark. We need to see what apps he¡¯s addicted to!

BROWSER

Good idea! We are on the first page. Maybe we need to go to another page.

CLOCK

Genius! What are we waiting for? Let¡¯s go!

Three apps ran down the stage.

The lights turn down. Some apps are sitting leisurely on the stage. Mark was surrounded by them. Clock, Settings and Browser walk slowly to the left side of the stage.

WEIBO

Apps! I have a big announcement! A female star is pregnant again! Another actor have an affair¡­¡­ Oh, no! Things turned around! The actor responded to his scandal!

MARK

Interesting! Let me see if I want to buy a new headset recently¡­¡­

TAOBAO

Look at me£¡ I recommend a new headset for you! And it¡¯s double 12 Shopping Festival! I am very cheap!

ZHIHU

Do you know what it is like to be an ordinary person with a 100,000 dollars monthly income?

WECHAT

Come on! Someone sent a huge red envelope in the group!

MARK

You lying bastard! It¡¯s only ten cents!

WECHAT

Look, in the group ¡±We are family¡±, your uncle updated an article that talks about ¡°Shocked! Don¡¯t eat breakfast with your empty stomach!¡±

QQ

Get away, Wechat. It¡¯s a click-bait! Mark, don¡¯t you want to know how much ¡°like¡±s have you got? Don¡¯t forget the ¡°Fire¡±, it is going out!

CLOCK

I just can¡¯t believe that! It turns out that he had been using these Apps to kill time, and it was obvious that he should go to finish his homework.

TICTOK

Hey everybody, some crazy videos are coming!

BROWSER

It¡¯s it again! Mark always stays with it for at least eight hours!

MARK

Oh my god, Tictok makes me craaaaaaazy!

TICTOK

Tell me, Mark, do you want to stay in your room just for studying?

MARK

No!

TICTOK

Then why not come to play with us!

SETTINGS

Shut up! You such a bad guy !

SETTINGS

Do you know the ABC songs?

TICTOK

Emmm£¬ ABCDEFG£¿

SETTINGS

No, is ABCDEF¡ª¡ª Gun!

Settings takes out a gun and shoot TICTOK. TICTOK fall to the ground with a scream. The others looked at him in fear, running down in stage.

CLOCK

Oh my god, did you kill it?

SETTINGS

No, I uninstalled him.

BROWSER

I remember you uninstalled him many times.

SETTINGS

This is because every time Mark always installs it back and   then uninstalls it. It¡¯s a circle.

CLOCK

Now Mark is finally going to do his homework. What else can   we do?

SETTINGS

Let¡¯s go into the ¡°Airplane Mode¡±.

CLOCK

Are you sure? I always thought it was stupid.

BROWSER

Come on. This is for Mark. The Airplane Mode can help him    avoid the invitation from his friends and the woman who asks him that ¡°Would you like to order our insurance service?¡±   in learning.

CLOCK

Okay, okay, I will do that. I just hope we can have a perfect trip.

BROWSER

Great start. He is doing English now.

CLOCK

Do you remember the last time? It wasn¡¯t an interesting    voyage.

BROWSER

Yep. If I remember correctly, he was doing PHYSICS last time.

CLOCK

Well, the ZUOYEBANG was dying. But even if he checked the answer, he couldn¡¯t understand it any more.

A violent shake.

CLOCK

WHAT IS HAPPENING?!

BROWSER

Is it PHYSICS again?!

SETTINGS

No. Worse. It¡¯s MATH!

CLOCK

Oh my gash! We are dying!

BROWSER

I have already said that the full name of Math is ¡°Mental    Abuse To Humans.¡±

WANGYIYUN

It seems that we need some EXCITING music now!

CLOCK

Who are you! Why are you here?

WANGYIYUN

Whenever Apps need BGM, I will appear!

CLOCK

This is not the time to tell jokes, please!

CLOCK

We have to do something. This mobile phone is very expensive!

BROWSER

You can buy it with yourself, because ¡°Time is money¡±!

CLOCK

So what? You should go out and punch Mark, because ¡°Knowledge is power¡±!

SETTINGS

Something worse happened! Our PILOT fell down!

BROWSER

You said OUR PILOT WAS GONE? So who is the maintaining the      Airplane Mode now?

WANGYIYUN

And I always thought you were the Pilot! I think we need some    suspense music now!

CLOCK

STOP FIDDLING WITH YOUR DAMN AUDIO!

SETTINGS

Emm. You got me wrong. I said is PILOT. He accidentally knocked his   PILOT down to the floor just now.

BROWSER

It actually scares me! I have just figured out how to escape in our   FRIEND SHIP.

CLOCK

Bad joke. But it looks much better now. He must have finished his    math homework.

SETTINGS

Right. So it¡¯s time for a break. Let¡¯s get out of the Airplane Mode.

Actually, I don¡¯t think is a good way to save Mark from phone.

CLOCK

I agree.

BROWSER

I got it! The reason why Mark so addicted to those Apps is that they are too attractive! So we can find a way to make them become boring!

SETTINGS

Good ideas. I would go to tell them!

BROWSER

I will go with you!

WANGYIYUN

Aha, no one found me!

The three Apps run off the stage. The light turns down.

MARK(V.O)

What the hell is this?! Why are these Apps become so strange today?

TAOBAO(V.O)

I don¡¯t have anything to recommend to you, unless you like medlar and mug.

WEIBO(V.O)

No one gets married. The only news is that Xiaoming helped an old woman across the road.

QQ(V.O)

You have no ¡°like¡±s.

WECHAT(V.O£©

The only information you receive is the arrears notice.

MARK(V.O)

That¡¯s so boring! I don want to watch my phone anymore!

CLOCK(V.O)

We did it!

BROWSER£¨V.O£©

Search: How to hold a celebration party!

SETTINGS(V.O)

That¡¯s too exciting! But I have a question: Does anyone see where is Wangyiyun?

The light turns up.

WANGYIYUN

Hi, Mark.

WANGYIYUN

It¡¯s twelve o¡¯clock.

作者

觉得有帮助的话可以投喂煮啵,助力煮啵过上点外卖不用神卷的生活

本文作者:Flaw_Owl
看到这里的朋友们,作者十分感谢!如果你看到任何写得不清楚或是错误之处,或者是有什么希望看到的课程和内容笔记,欢迎在评论区留言!评论区可以单纯的发表文字,也可以使用 Markdown 语法,你可以参照 Markdown 官方教程发出带有格式的评论。

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